Settling In

I was only in Wyoming for ten days.

I returned home yesterday to find Maine transformed. The landscape is ablaze with fall colors. The forests are engulfed in a slow-motion fire, the green leaves of summer burning into gold and crimson before fading to brown.

I changed in that short time, too. Yes, just ten days. Not in some grand, autumnal hymn kind of way. I’m not trading in my hammers for a cowboy hat. It’s more subtle.

When I returned home last night, I found my usual routine disrupted. We all have routines, whether we’re conscious of them or not. They guide us through our days. Who has the stamina to decide anew each morning when to get up, what to eat for breakfast, when to leave for work, where to stop for gas, who’s cooking dinner?

This morning, home from Wyoming but not forced to fully re-enter my life in Maine just yet, I woke with no alarm telling me to get up, no calendar dictating where I need to go today, no clock deciding it’s time for breakfast and a shower. Free from the constructs that keep society moving, I feel a little out of sorts, a little unsettled—and I have to admit, I like it.

Our routines give us comfort. I love my normal morning routine: waking early, sipping coffee under a low light in a quiet room, without many thoughts or burdens on my mind. In the evening, I love reconnecting with Eliza on that same couch, sinking into the comfort of sharing the ups and downs of the day.

But other routines can feel stale. Travel creates just enough space to pause and shake off the dust. It gives us the chance to step back and reevaluate the routines—and the lives—we’ve created.

Right now, tired and dazed from the travel and time changes, I feel strangely fresh. Open to possibility. I could be anyone. Do anything. Right now, I’m not a slave to the routines I’ve built. This in-between time, when I’ve returned but don’t yet feel fully home, is like a little pocket of possibility. I’ve shaken off some of the dust.

I know I’ll settle back into routine. I’m looking forward to it. But right now, I’m not quite ready to leave this transitional space. Not yet.